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Why Is It So Hard to Get out of Bed?

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If you find yourself constantly needing to prove your worth, you have already forgotten your value.

(Roadturn Principle)

Why do I want to lose weight, earn more money, and start that new business?

Is my motivation really to take better care of my family… or is it to avoid that nagging, guilty feeling when they want something I can’t afford?

Am I really seeking ways to help others, or am I constantly comparing myself to them, wanting to come out on top?

My actions can be the same, but the motivation behind them determines whether they are a joy or a chore.

Why is it so hard to get out of bed some days?

Let’s set the obvious aside: if you’re not getting sufficient sleep because you don’t get to bed on time, you’re not going to want to get up on time. That’s called “burning the candle at both ends,” and it presents issues of its own.

But what about those days when you’ve already been in the sack for the requisite eight hours or so, but you still don’t want to get out of bed? What’s going on there?

Could your lack of enthusiasm for the new day be traced directly to the motivation you have to accomplish the tasks awaiting you?

I think so.

It’s an inside job.

Your choices are to get up dutifully and trudge through the day, doing what you have to do for the people who probably don’t appreciate you anyway… or to get your motivation from a source that’s NOT fueled by people-pleasing.

Hey, this is tough stuff. I know it is. I’ve done the work, and I’m doing the work myself. Motivation identification is an ongoing process. The more introspection I gain, the more amazed I am at how easy it is to get off track and begin acting like my personal worth is directly tied to my net worth.

Join me in the effort. You are not alone.

Roadturn Challenge: Choose something you do on a regular basis, but typically dread doing. Maybe it’s washing dishes, going to the gym, or even going to work. Start asking yourself why you do it at all, and don’t start asking “Why?” until the lights come on. This is information you don’t need to share with anyone else. It’s crucial that you get as honest as you can possibly get with yourself.

Here’s an example:

  • I go to the gym because I want to be in better physical condition. (Why?)
  • I want to be in better physical condition because I hate being overweight. (Why?)
  • I hate being overweight because I don’t want to look like I’m a lazy pig. (Why?)
  • I don’t want to look like I’m a lazy pig because it hurts my pride. (Why?)
  • It hurts my pride because I compare myself to others, and I ALWAYS come out “less than.”

I’ll stop there — not because the questioning of myself couldn’t go deeper, but because that sequence should amply illustrate the principle. If my reason to work out is to try to avoid something inevitable… then why work out at all? No wonder I’m not leaping out of bed to get to the gym!

As you can see, this is deep work. At some point, you’ll want to get perspective from a trusted mentor or professional counselor.

Roadturn Principle: If you find yourself constantly needing to prove your worth, you have already forgotten your value.

You are valuable. You are precious. You are needed.

When you get to the place where you’re getting out of bed because you KNOW your true personal value and the value of the day’s activities in front of you, you’ll find it much easier to move your feet from bed to floor.

When your “Why I’m doing it” is switched from “to impress others” to something deeper and greater, your enthusiasm will become contagious, and those who laugh at your efforts now will want to join you on the journey.

Let’s talk about it…

Formula For the Perfect Day – Things to Do

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To enjoy the perfect day, decide what that day would look like… then schedule it.

(Roadturn Principles)

I’m not (necessarily) talking about a trip to Maui or hitting a zillion-dollar lottery payout.

For most of us, a “perfect day” would include things like getting up earlier, preparing a healthy breakfast for ourselves, taking time for exercise (both mind and body), spending time with our loved ones, and accomplishing tasks we’d love to get done.

That’s the good news and the bad news: we know what we want — but, how to follow through and get it done? That part escapes us.

I’m here to tell you it is possible to enjoy your perfect day — day after day. There are some things to do, though, and I can’t do them for you. You’ll have to provide the action.

Here’s the perfect day system, in a nutshell.

Formula For the Perfect Day – Things to Do

Those who say life “just isn’t that simple” are missing their own point. Life is way beyond our understanding. All of our knowledge consists of theories, not facts. Science can’t fully explain gravity, light, or even water.How to have the Perfect Day - Things to Do

We keep it simple because we’re simple people. Those who want to know all about something before doing it are likely to end up not doing anything.

So, don’t try to analyze these fundamental steps, don’t come up with reasons why they won’t work for you… just do them.

You’ll be amazed at the results.

Roadturn Challenge: Design your perfect day

STEP ONE for the Perfect Day: Make a list of the necessary components for your perfect day — your “Things to Do” list. Again, that will probably be things like when you get up, what you eat, and other ways you take care of yourself and your responsibilities.

If your perfect day is, in fact, a vacation to Maui and you don’t have the money or time to get on the plane, then you need The DEEP. For this exercises, think about how a regular day might look, instead of planning your dream vacation.

STEP TWO for the Perfect Day: Schedule those things to do. Block them in on your calendar, being sure to provide a little extra time for each. You probably can’t be at the gym from 0700 to 0800 and still start work at 0800. Be realistic. Be kind to yourself. Make your Perfect Day absolutely achievable.

STEP THREE for the Perfect Day: Follow your plan and allow NOTHING to interfere. Can you prevent getting sidetracked? You bet. Turn down all interruptions, phone calls, websites, emails, pleadings from others… short of a bonafide emergency, do not deviate from your schedule.

Roadturn Principle: The secret to success: Make this day “some day.”

Do this just once. Get a taste for what it feels like to be making the best decisions for yourself and living the way you KNOW you should be living, and you won’t want to stop.

Does this formula sound too simple?

Good! Then, you won’t have any trouble carrying it out.

My goal is not to get you to READ what I write, but to DO what I suggest. Roadturn Principles aren’t theory. They are born from years of personal experience on the journey.

Need help?

Let’s talk…

Break the Rules and Don’t Turn Back

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There ain’t no rules around here. We’re trying to accomplish something.

(Quote attributed to Thomas Edison)

When you really want to get something done, you find a way.

When you’re not sure you want to get it done, you find an excuse.

Break the rules and don’t turn back

Self-help books, diet plans, and solemn promises to oneself about making real change ‘tomorrow’ are sometimes only thinly-disguised schemes to prolong action.

C’mon, admit it.

Thomas Alva Edison quote on Roadturn
Thomas Alva Edison (public domain photo)

I’ve done it, and so have you.

Do you REALLY WANT to lose weight, get back in shape, or start your own business? Is there something else in your heart and on your mind you want to accomplish.

You CAN, if you want to.

You may have to break a few rules, though… rules like this:

  • I have to know everything about something before I can get started
  • I have to find the perfect gym, diet, job, passion… in order to succeed
  • I need my spouse, children, parents to be supportive of my decisions

What’s holding you back? What’s really holding you back?

I know the answer to that question: It’s YOU.

Challenge: List the ‘rules’ that keep you from moving towards those things you really want. Then break those rules.

Roadturn Principle: Whether you say you can’t or say you can… you’re right.

Let’s talk about it…

 

Breaking a Habit – Here’s How

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The chains of habit are too weak to be felt until they are too strong to be broken.

(Quote attributed to Samuel Johnson)

It’s a frightening proposition: one cigarette may lead to an addiction that’s all but impossible to break.

One drink of alcohol can set off a chain reaction that takes one to prison or to an early grave.

I don’t pretend to understand the nature of addiction, but I have seen the results of it. And so have you.

Habits aren’t necessarily a bad thing to have, though. And breaking a habit doesn’t have to be that tough. A certain amount of routine balances our lives and gives us a sense of stability.

Our habits are good or bad according to whether they support or ambush our best interests.

Dr. Samuel Johnson - Roadturn Principles
Dr. Samuel Johnson (public domain portrait)

> When I’m going to the gym regularly and need to travel, I want to be sure the hotel has a decent workout room.

> When I’m eating right and go to a restaurant, I want to be sure there are healthy options available.

Bad habits can weigh you down and strip your potential, but there’s one sure way to get rid of a bad habit: replace it with a good habit.

You can do that, if you will.

Challenge: Pick something you habitually do, but want to stop doing. Think of something healthy you want to begin doing that would make an excellent replacement for the bad habit. Then make the switch. At first, you’ll need to be carefully mindful of what you’re doing. You’ll need to make the switch. After a bit, though, you’ll find it easier and easier. Pretty soon, you’ll be on a different trail altogether.

Roadturn Principle: The minute you refuse to fall for the same old story again, the minute you stand up and oppose the voice that says you can’t, that is the moment in time when you will know you CAN.

Let’s talk about it…

Don’t Wait – Here’s What Happens

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If you wait, all that happens is that you get older.

(Quote attributed to Mario Andretti)

 

“I’ll start Monday.”

“This is the last time I’m going to do this.”

If we tell ourselves we’re going to change (but not just yet), we let ourselves off the hook for a bit.

At least until we fail to do what we promised.

Don't Wait! Mario Andretti quote on Roadturn
Mario Andretti (creative commons photo BY-SA 3.0)

Next year at this time, you’ll be one year older.

That much we know.

But will you be in better shape or worse shape?

Will you weigh more or weigh less?

Will you feel like a million dollars or like a bad check?

That part is up to you.

Don’t wait to change your life. Do it now.

Challenge: What ONE THING do you want most to see changed over the coming year? Write it down. Now determine one small step you can take in that direction TODAY. Then take it.

Roadturn Principle: If you want to feel good, do what you know you should do.

Let’s talk about it…

The Real Wealth of Life – Will You Take It?

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It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.

(Mahatma Gandhi)

A friend was once asked to ‘babysit’ a show dog.

This dog was so valuable to its owner that a special type of food was required — along with various vitamins and supplements — for every meal.

Mahatma Gandhi - What is the Real Wealth of Life?
Mahatma Gandhi (public domain photo)

The dog could only drink the purest of water, needed to eat on schedule, and required a vigourous exercise routine daily.

Speaking of the experience afterwards, the dazed dog-sitter told me the strangest part was when the owner returned. The two met at a McDonald’s to debrief.

“It was surreal,” he confided, “knowing how he fed his dog, but watching him chug a soft drink and eat a Big Mac.”

Real wealth is available to everyone, but not everyone cares

We work every day to keep the bills paid and money in the bank.

We rarely miss a meal and most of us take on way more calories than we need.

We dread going to the gym and working up a sweat.

We WANT to be healthy, but we chug the Coke and eat the breadsticks anyway. Are we mad?

What is the ‘real wealth of life’?

Let’s talk about it.