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The DEEP

The Biggest Time Waster of All

By Don on January 9, 2018 0

time wasters
time wasters
Image by Capri23auto – Creative Commons via Pixabay

WHAT WOULD YOU SAY is the biggest time-wasting activity in your daily life?

Some say it’s spending too much time on social media, some point to a fascination with news headlines, others say they’re too busy to waste any time whatsoever. Time is too precious to waste.

I agree.

Allow me to tell you a brief (true) story, then the conclusion I’ve drawn from it.

How the electric bill doubled in one month

My son was complaining about his room being too cold. He kept jacking up the main thermostat and overheating everyone else.

So, I bought a portable electric heater for his room. His brother piped in that he’d have to have one for his room too.

Problem solved.

The next month, my electric bill almost doubled.

It wasn’t because the weather turned suddenly colder. It was all due to those two seemingly harmless and helpful little heaters. You could argue the extra charge for electricity will be offset by the lower need for natural gas … and I hope so … but that’s not the point.

Little things can make a huge difference

What is there in your life that doesn’t take a long time to do, but you find yourself doing it frequently?

Look there first.

Those heaters weren’t blowing heat all the time, but they were switching on often.

  • Do you keep your smartphone handy and check it constantly?
  • Do you keep your email program open and deal with messages on the fly?
  • Are you always in need of a snack or drink or quick trip to the grocery store?

Those little things can take up a large chuck of time. If you’ll start noticing those actions you thought were inconsequential, you may find they’re the primary culprit stopping you from accomplishing all you set out to do every day.

Seems incredible … but check it out.

Here’s the fix

You don’t have to knock off the little things completely. Just get them under control.

Here’s a method I like. It comes from a system I outline in The DEEP:

  • Decide what you’re going to focus on next. It doesn’t have to be the most pressing or important project in front of you, it only needs to be the thing you’re willing to devote the next chunk of your time to.
  • Get your drink, your snack, your break — whatever you think you need to do first — get it out of the way. Do the little things FIRST, not during.
  • Do what you’ve decided to do and focus on it entirely. No distractions allowed. Don’t pick up your phone, check your email, visit Facebook … no little things allowed … until you’re either finished or you’ve been at the task long enough to deserve a break (set a timer if you wish).
  • Take a brief break. Allow yourself a few minutes of little things, then rinse and repeat as needed.
  • Remember, this isn’t only about work. When you sit down to eat with your family, focus on your family. Give them your full attention. In the smartphone age, full attention is a rare commodity.

Here’s the primary lesson: When you’re working on something, work on it. When you’re not, don’t.

The little things aren’t bad in themselves. If you major in the minors, though, you’ll never operate at anywhere near your full potential.

Let’s talk about it.

— Don

** If you don’t yet have your copy of the How to LIVE field guide … get it now. If you do have it, read it, use it, and leave a review. Help get the word out.

What Happened to Brian?

By Don on January 6, 2018 0

IF ANYONE HAD plenty of reasons to live … it was Brian.

A beautiful wife, great job, son of one of the wealthiest men on the planet … Brian had it made.

I clocked in early and left late, trying to earn another little raise at my copywriting job.

Brian rented an RV and toured the West with his family.

I needed a reason to leave my desk and go run an errand … and it’d better be a darned good reason.

Brian came and went as he wished, answering to nobody but himself.

Brian was rich and powerful. I was the opposite.

What Happened to Brian?

I met with him the day before it happened.

Just the two of us in the marketing conference room. We talked about SEO and a new website project. We went over blog analytics and social media plans. But I could tell something was wrong. The old fire was missing.

I said, “Hey, I hear you’re going to be heading overseas again soon, maybe even take over the Asian division.”

“No,” he shook his head, “no, that’s not going to happen now.”

I wanted to press further. I wanted to say, “Brian, what’s up? You seem off today.” But I didn’t want to butt into his business.

Guys are tough, you know. We don’t need a lot of hand-holding or emotional triage. I held my concern for another time. Maybe we could grab lunch together soon. Maybe I’d stop by his office later …

but that was the last time I saw Brian.

I was at my desk about 0600 the next morning. Half an hour later, I checked my email and found a message from the company president: Brian is dead. He will be missed. Funeral arrangements pending.

My heart sunk. My head went wild. I checked the local news — had there been a car wreck?

Nothing.

The marketing manager told me later, something I’d already suspected: Brian killed himself. Gunshot to the head.

Goodbye, Brian.

That was years ago, but I still think of him often.

Especially on days when life is tough (that’s just about every day), especially when finances are iffy, and I’m wondering how to make ends meet.

Brian had it made. But he doesn’t anymore.

I do.

How to Stay on Track

By Don on January 3, 2018 0

going the wrong way?
going the wrong way?
Photo by Lynn Friedman – Creative Commons

HAVE YOU EVER found yourself driving down the road on autopilot, then realized you’re heading the wrong direction?

This morning, I dropped my daughter off at a restaurant to meet up with friends. My plan was to continue on to the UPS store to mail a couple of packages, then stop by Whole Foods for a few items, then head back home.

Instead, I began thinking about the project waiting on my desk, turned right instead of going straight ahead, and woke up a few minutes later to the fact that I was driving in the wrong direction.

You know what I instantly did next … right?

Did I turn around?

Not immediately.

FIRST I debated the idea. After all, I’d already driven towards home a ways … why not just keep going? I could come back later in the day, or even tomorrow, to run errands.

THEN I decided I’d rather get those things done now than leave them hanging. I was still considerably closer to the shops I needed to visit than I would be at home.

SO I made a left, circled back around, and got back on track.

Here’s Why That Matters to You

Let’s say you want to lose some weight, so you’ve decided to eat for strength instead of pleasure. It’s day two of your new diet, and you absentmindedly find yourself biting into a doughnut.

What now?

Do you say, “Well, I’ve blown it already, so I may as well eat the whole pack and start again tomorrow!” … or do you stop yourself, turn around, and get right back on target?

If you’re like me, most of the time you throw in the towel and pig out.

The same goes for your plan to write that book, get trained up for that new career, or start going to the gym regularly.

Here’s a lesson to take to the bank: You’re going to stumble along the way. It’s all but inevitable. You’re a human being, and you’re apt to get distracted or develop a crappy attitude and stop caring as deeply as you did when you began.

Here’s how to stay on course: Do The DEEP.

I’m not saying that because I wrote the program. I’m saying that because the program WORKS. It’s a proven, field-tested method to help you keep walking in the direction you most want to go.

Life is serious stuff, my friend, and it goes faster than any of us ever imagine. There’s no time to waste. None.

Here’s where to go for info: The DEEP.

Write me. Let’s talk about it.

— Don

Circles, Spirals, and Straight Lines

By Don on January 25, 2017 0

CC Graphic by Tony Kay (cropped)

Some people seem to know who they are and what they want from life right from the get-go. God bless them. I’ve often wished I would’ve been born one of them. They are straight-liners. They set out for a goal, accomplish the goal, then set another. As long as there’s another mountain to climb, they’re happy campers.

Others are content with a circle of repetition that never really goes anywhere. Maybe an okay job, or an okay marriage, or an okay spiritual life. They don’t make waves, and they don’t put on airs. They go round and round and round… sometimes really wanting to take a risk or make a change, but never figuring out how to break the pattern.

spiral thinking on Roadturn
CC Graphic by Tony Kay (cropped)

Me, I’m a spiral sort of guy. From a short-term perspective, my path looks like a circle. I’ll go day after day or month after month focused on a project or thought, wrestling with it like Jacob with the angel… until I finally get the blessing from it.

Sometimes that blessing is a new understanding or a new skill. Sometimes it’s the realization that something I thought I wanted isn’t what I needed. Sometimes, there’s a breakthrough that dramatically changes my direction. My life is a spiral, consistently headed towards home.

Here’s what The DEEP does: It takes circles and spirals and helps them get a taste of the solid direction straightliners have. And it helps straightliners get a taste of what the circles and spirals see.

Everybody needs something. None of us has it all figured out or has it all in a bucket. We need one another. That’s what The DEEP does: It helps us grow. It helps us mature. It helps us do what we’ve never been able to do before.

FAST.

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Everybody Needs a Roadturn Now and Then

By Don on August 20, 2016 0

Roadturn Choices

 

You know the feeling.

You’re at a crossroads. A decision point. A Frost-like place where two roads diverge in the woods.

Which path to choose? You know you can’t travel both.

Your decision will likely make a profound difference in your life.

Should you marry that person? Take that job? Move to another state or country?

It’s tough stuff.

Roadturn Choices

[clickToTweet tweet=”Life has a way of presenting us with choices we can’t avoid forever. We must choose.” quote=”Life has a way of presenting us with choices we can’t avoid forever. We must choose.” theme=”style3″]

And there are times when we freeze with fear and put off making the decision at all.

That’s even tougher. The anxiety is intense.

Or maybe you don’t get to make the decision about what happens.

Maybe it’s a game-changing event you have no control over.

Your option is about how to react, what to do about the situation.

Now what?

[clickToTweet tweet=”Roadturns make a huge difference, though they aren’t necessarily that big of a deal to others.” quote=”Roadturns make a huge difference, though they aren’t necessarily that big of a deal to others.”]

A roadturn can simply be something someone said, something that had a profound influence on your thinking from that point forward.

My own first conscious experience with the phenomenon was seeing the video of Paul Potts at the Britain’s Got Talent contest in 2007. Paul’s courage in the face of fear, doubt, and social opposition helped me gain the courage to take my own chance and let go of the need for “absolute security.”

I’ve written about that experience several times on this blog. Here’s one of those posts: The Road Not Taken. And I love hearing from others about their own roadturn experiences.

[clickToTweet tweet=”Face the fear. Make the decision. Get on the Way.” quote=”Face the fear. Make the decision. Get on the Way.”]

Since 2007, my path has been one of developing a career in marketing and copywriting. I help businesses (and I especially love small, entrepreneurial businesses) get better known, reach more customers, and sell more stuff.

I love the work, and I love seeing others grow their dreams.

But my own primary fascination centers on Roadturn: not the carrying out of the dream so much as how one comes to see, believe, and take action in the first place.

That’s exactly what a training program I created for a Small Business Development Center (SBDC) incubator is about. It takes would-be entrepreneurs from the “I have an idea” stage to the “I can do this” stage.

That program is the most powerful way I know of to deal with roadturn situations and stay on track.

Roadturn readers can get the audio version of The DEEP absolutely free. All I ask is that you respond with your feedback after each session in order to get access to the next.

The DEEP can absolutely change your life. Find out how by clicking here: GO DEEP!

 

 

Finding My Own Way, My Perfect Path

By Don on August 19, 2015 0

Roadturn quote graphic

Go quietly on the path you have chosen

That was the topic for a group discussion I attended tonight.

It was a good talk.

Especially, I was fascinated by how the participants identified with and emphasized different parts of the idea we were examining.

Some were taken by the word “quietly.”

Their path, to date, had been anything BUT quiet. Several exuded a certain sense of pride in that accomplishment. “I came out of the womb screaming, and I’ve not shut my mouth since.” Others expressed a desire to BE quiet — to find solace in mediation and prayer.

Some lamented about “path.”

How can one choose a SINGLE path? How can one choose a path at all? Isn’t the best approach to life to “take it as it comes” and not try to force my will at all? We were tempted to make choice versus non-choice the new topic of conversation… but somehow resisted.

I was one of those who landed on “you have chosen.”

For me, that’s a HUGE realization.

 

I know who put me here

Wherever I am, whoever I am, I can put the responsibility (and the blame) on others — or I can embrace my freedom to choose.

To claim that I would be happy if only YOU (or she, or it) would change is to deny my personal power. It is to make myself a willing hostage to your every whim.

Moreover, if I have chosen my own path — then I can change the direction I’m headed or the path I’m on.

If people and situations have chosen the path for me… I’m stuck.

How about you?

How’s your path today?

Has life dealt you a terrible hand?

That certainly happens.

[clickToTweet tweet=”The final human freedom: http://bit.ly/1E2DFsV @donsturgill” quote=”Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of human freedoms – to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way (Viktor E. Frankl, Dachau Concentration Camp).”]

Not every path is pretty

Some are born in horrible poverty. Some are mistreated severely. Some are maimed and suffer from maladies you and I can’t comprehend.

I think Dr. Viktor Frankl was on to something when he observed (from the Dachau concentration camp during WWII) that the “final human freedom” is the right to choose our own attitude in any given circumstance.

We can survive anything… if we will to.

We will fail immediately… when we give up.

Whatever your circumstance right now — whatever your pain, your grief, your loneliness, your complaint — don’t stop trying.

Keep going.

Get up.

Get a new plan.

Go at it again.

Choose YOUR path… and walk it “quietly.”

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